What You Believe In Life, Is True for You
A belief is your brain’s way of making sense of this complex world and navigating it. So, if you believe in something strongly, and if you truly believe it, it’s true for you. The factual accuracy of your beliefs is of far less importance than you might expect.
Evidently, what you believe is true is what shapes your reality.
A speech in the movie Secondhand Lions with Robert Duvall explains that ‘sometimes the things that may or may not be true are the things a man needs to believe in the most. Some of these things are that people are basically good; that honor, courage, and virtue mean everything; that power and money mean nothing; that good always triumphs over evil; and true love never dies. It doesn’t matter if it’s true or not. A person should believe in those things because those are the things worth believing in’. Someone spent a lifetime learning that little life lesson. Don’t miss gems just because they are scattered about. That’s one point worth remembering.
Why Your Beliefs Are to Make Sense of the World?
The world we live in is less defined and factual than we all like to believe. Right and wrong are often subject to interpretation. Concepts as simple as up and down become convoluted when you realize we are on a spinning dot, circling a small sun, hurtling through one of billions of galaxies.
If you like things in your life to be clear and comprehensible, this ride might get a bit bumpy for you.
It’s easier to live when you believe that people are basically good, even though that may not always be true. You simply want to believe that. Of course, you know that isn’t always true of everyone, or even anyone all the time. But having faith that most people are inherently good is worth believing in and acting upon.
People will often live up to your expectations, good or bad. You will find more good when you look for good and expect good from those around you. Further, you can identify and surround yourself with those who are good and value what is positive within you. You might be surprised how often others are surprised and thrilled to meet someone they see as good and value those people in their lives. In essence, your belief can take root and and influence your reality in very real terms. Your belief can help make it so.
Make Certain Your Beliefs Are Right
It’s worth believing that kindness, decency, honesty, and integrity are all the right principles worth living by, even if they come at a cost. Those are good principles, no doubt. And they are the foundation of a good life. So, you can choose to believe in and live by those principles.
The main premise here is that sometimes, you have to choose what is worth believing in, even if it may not always be true. And in your belief, you make it true.
Your Beliefs Shape Your Reality
Let’s say you believe that when you die at the end of a kind and caring life, you go to heaven, and you believe there’s an eternity of bliss as your reward. How might that affect your choices in life? What if you believe this one life is all there is, and you want to be rich and famous, flying private jets serving champagne and caviar.
What is the impact of what you want and what you believe on the world according to you? You will live a different life. Also, you will feel differently about life.
If you believe that treating people kindly and with respect is fundamental, you will live a different life, and you treat people differently.
For example, I believe I’m lucky, and I see good fortune all around me. I look for it. I’m grateful for it. When you are aware of all the good things that happen and all the bad that did not, you might be amazed to discover how lucky you are too. If you have ever wondered what it was like to be lucky, I can tell you it is wonderful.
Thoughts, Beliefs, Actions, and Outcomes
I see how some people treat others on the internet. You’ll find some really dark stuff with people mocking, criticizing, and hating one another.
That sort of thinking can cause you to live a different life. Your life will be miserable, and you just wake up feeling horrible. You can train yourself to see the worst in everyone. When you believe humanity is awful, you live in a place where things are bad.
It’s interesting to note that the foundation of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is that when you believe something is true, it affects your reality.
CBT is a treatment approach used to recognize negative or even damaging thought and behavior patterns. CBT is a type of talk therapy that identifies and explores the ways your emotions and thoughts can influence your actions and thereby outcomes.
CBT is effective because once you notice certain undesirable patterns in your beliefs, you can start making life changes to your behaviors and outcomes.
Essentially, our beliefs drive our thinking, and our thinking drives our behavior. When you believe that people are basically good, you will behave differently, and the world will look different to you. You have different thoughts, and you give people the benefit of the doubt more often. Your actions will align with your new thoughts and new beliefs. You’ll become more tolerant of other people’s beliefs.
You Can Choose the Things You Want to Believe
As I already mentioned, some of the best things you can believe are that people are good, that good will win over evil, and that kindness works. You can create your life based on choosing what you believe in. You can just choose to go with your beliefs, not analyzing, re-analyzing, questioning, and doubting them. Make the decision, lean in, and live by them.
You can simply say, “This is a principle I choose to believe in.” It’s not that you can never change your mind. But for the time being, this is what you believe. And you’re going to live by it. So that being the topic, if you believe something, it’s true for you. And it’s alright to believe in something even if you can’t prove that it’s true. It doesn’t matter if others don’t believe in it. They are creating their world around their beliefs. You are in charge of yours.
It’s a big world with a lot of different thoughts. So it’s perfectly alright to believe what you believe.
Don’t Try to Impose Your Beliefs on Other People
Don’t recruit by persuading others to your viewpoint. Instead, allow others that feel as you do to find you. That is your tribe.
While it’s okay for you to choose your beliefs, even if there are doubts, you really need to accept that it’s okay for other people to believe other things. And these things could be totally different—even incompatible—from what you believe in. A life well lived may inspire others to your worldview at their discretion. However, changing other people is near impossible.
Lean into who you are and what you value. Get out and allow your tribe to find you. When it comes to relationships, especially close relationships, invest your effort in the people who value the real you. Do not invest in relationships that require you to live up to someone you don’t want to be.
Young men chase lovely women and ‘act’ like the man they think she wants. That is a recipe for disaster. Then you either have to pretend to be that man for the rest of your life or complain about alimony and child support payments after your divorce.
Allow women to see who you really are and decide if they like the real you. Candidly, this is way easier. You will find being te real you comes way easier and, you might be surprised at who good you are at it.
What Do You Choose to Believe?
What do you believe in and value? Get that journal warmed up. Start writing it down. Who are you, and what do you stand for?
What would you like to believe? What are the things that are worth believing?
You are not stuck thinking and believing what you do now.
If you’re able to believe in things that matter to you, then you can craft your own world.
It’s okay to allow different beliefs to exist. People can believe different things and coexist peacefully and happily. Recognizing that all our worlds can be different is part of the richness of life. You need to understand that there’s a lot of middle ground, despite how it often appears on the internet. Moderation rarely gets clicks, but most of life happens well within the margins.
For instance, you can believe that people are good, although you know that a lot of people aren’t. But you still believe that the fundamental of people is good. In doing that, you’re going to attract good people. If you allow it to happen without forcing it, if you go out and be that person who believes people are good, you will attract ‘like’. You will attract others in your life who share those values.
Figure out what your beliefs are. And live the life you want in the world of your own creation.
That’s right. Let’s say you believe work is important in your life. So, you are going to work. But you are not going to live for money. I believe that’s the best way to live.
You are going to make enough money, and you are going to be responsible. You are going to work hard. You are going to be thinking about investments, and you are going to make them. But you are not going to make it your whole life. You are not going to make it some reflection of who you are as a man. You need to believe a man has to be good, kind, and decent. Not necessarily rich. And if you believe those things, that’s your world.
If you want that world, you can choose to believe those things. I am sure you see the circular argument I’m trying to create. Yes, it’s possible to create your own world. You are very much able to create your own world starting with your beliefs. You can create your own reality. Unfortunately, there are people living in some very dark places right now. Their thoughts are fueled by social media and videos from “experts.” They’ve allowed somebody else to create that reality for them. They don’t realize that they are allowing self-serving “experts” to distort their reality.
Conclusion: The meaning of life
Your beliefs about life’s meaning is a topic so big as to be laughable. Ask a friend or family member what the meaning of life is and pay attention to the answer, or more likely, the response. Put these into your journal. I suspect you will find the answers (and responses) disappointing. And they’ll all assume you are going through some kind of phase (early mid-life crisis?).
We’ll get to the meaning of life in due course. For now, as a step toward that end, explore what your beliefs are as well as the things that are worth believing in, even if they may or may not be true.
